Reflective Functioning Questionnaire

Please work through the next 46 statements. For each statement, choose a number between 1 and 7 to indicate how much you agree or disagree with the statement. Do not think too much about it – your initial responses are usually the best.

Use the following scale: 1 (strongly disagree) to 7 (strongly agree)
*
People’s thoughts are a mystery to me*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I worry a great deal about what people are thinking and feeling*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
My picture of my parents changes as I change*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I realise that I can sometimes misunderstand my best friends’ reactions*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I believe that my parents’ behaviour towards me should not be explained by how they were brought up*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Other people tell me I’m a good listener*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I often have to force people to do what I want them to do*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I always know what I feel*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I feel that, if I am not careful, I could intrude into another person’s life*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I often get confused about what I am feeling*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I believe that people can see a situation very differently based on their own beliefs and experiences*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I believe there’s no point trying to guess what’s on someone else’s mind*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I get confused when people talk about their feelings*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I believe other people are too confusing to bother figuring out*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I find it difficult to see other people’s points of view*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I am a good mind reader*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I don’t always know why I do what I do*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I pay attention to my feelings*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
In an argument, I keep the other person’s point of view in mind*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Understanding the reasons for people’s actions helps me to forgive them*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I believe that there is no RIGHT way of seeing any situation*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
When I get angry I say things without really knowing why I am saying them*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Those close to me often seem to find it difficult to understand why I do things*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I am better guided by reason than by my gut*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I usually know exactly what other people are thinking*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I can’t remember much about when I was a child*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Strong feelings often cloud my thinking*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I trust my feelings*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
When I get angry I say things that I later regret*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
My intuition about a person is hardly ever wrong*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
For me actions speak louder than words*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I frequently feel that my mind is empty*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I anticipate that my feelings might change even about something I feel strongly about*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I like to think about the reasons behind my actions*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
If I feel insecure I can behave in ways that put others’ backs up*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Sometimes I do things without really knowing why*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I can tell how someone is feeling by looking at their eyes*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Sometimes I find myself saying things and I have no idea why I said them*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
In order to know exactly how someone is feeling, I have found that I need to ask them*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I can mostly predict what someone else will do*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I’m often curious about the meaning behind others’ actions*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I have noticed that people often give advice to others that they actually wish to follow themselves*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I wonder what my dreams mean*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
How I feel can easily affect how I understand someone else’s behaviour*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I pay attention to the impact of my actions on others’ feelings*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
I know exactly what my close friends are thinking*
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
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Reflective Functioning Questionnaire

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